One Meets Eight (featuring Eleven)
by Tornade d'Or
Summary: A friendly competition of "one small step for man" (it'll make sense when you start reading) turns into a (very fast, and not overly dramatic) search and rescue when the Eighth Doctor runs into a weeping angel.


_This story takes place before the events of _An Unearthly Child_, after the events of the 1996 television movie, and during the events of_ The Eleventh Hour—simultaneously.

_It'll make sense when you start reading it._

Gallifrey, date unknown. A Time Lord of roughly 100 years of age runs to the array of TARDISes, picks one at random, and quickly gets inside. The last thing he hears before he slams the door shut in a hurry is "What kind of an idiot would steal a faulty TARDIS?" Not one second later, the TARDIS dematerialized into time and space.

Earth, December 1999. The Doctor, feeling quite proud of himself for having saved the world from the Master's evil plan, sits comfortably in a recliner within his TARDIS and continues reading H. G. Wells' _The Time Machine_. Suddenly, the TARDIS bumps into something with a loud **THUD**, causing the Doctor to drop his book, which closes before it hits the ground. Blimey, he thinks to himself, I lost my place! He opens the door to inspect the damage, and then he exclaims "Oh, my giddy aunt!" He then recalls, "Hunh, haven't said that in a while."

Turns out the **THUD** had been caused by—and could also be felt in—the First Doctor's TARDIS (which, of course, was not yet stuck in the form of a 1960s police box), and he had had the exact same instinct to check for scratches or dents—and was equally surprised to see his future self (whom he didn't recognize) coming out of a blue box that appeared to be bigger on the inside.

"Get out of the way, you curly-haired buffoon!" he yells.

The Eighth Doctor rolls his eyes. Was I always this cranky? he wonders.

**CRASH!** Both TARDISes suddenly hit the ground, leaving just enough time for the two Doctors to be thrown into each other's ships before they materialize.

Moon, July 1969. The Eighth Doctor glances at the date readout. "19 July 1969". His knowledge of human history tells him that America's _Apollo 11_ probe, from which mankind was to make the first footprint on the moon, wasn't due for another 24 Earth hours. He can't resist the temptation to "mess up" the most significant event in human space travel, so he opens the door, reaches his foot out over the ancient surface, and takes a step, giggling to himself all the while.

But then he remembers that his first incarnation had materialized 3 months before and had the same idea. And now beating this "old man" at taking the first step on the moon is more important to him than getting his TARDIS back or finishing his book. He goes back to an hour before the more recent TARDIS is due to materialize—making sure to be within 15 feet of that spot, and facing it—and takes a single step outside. Then, he waits for himself to "crash-land" and see what had just happened.

He stays inside the TARDIS and listens through the door. He hears the familiar "VWORP, VWORP, VWORP" of materialization (and briefly wonders if it's even supposed to make that sound), and then a small footprint, followed by a string of expletives (in various languages), and finally another "VWORP, VWORP, VWORP".

The First Doctor goes back to September 1967, takes what he thinks is the first step on the moon, gives a satisfied smirk, and then is utterly angered to find that that "curly-haired buffoon" has beaten him—by a whole year. Similarly, the Eighth Doctor is more than a little frustrated when he remembers that his first incarnation took the first step back in November 1965. This cycle keeps repeating itself until, by the time Neil Armstrong lands on the moon, the lunar surface is absolutely covered in footprints: "That's one small step—what the…?"

Moon, circa 13500 BC. A blue phone booth appears on the surface of the moon, and an old man steps out. Satisfied with having finally taken the first step _ever_ on the lunar surface, he finds a note:

_Nope, still didn't get it. I was going to give up and let you win, but then the craziest thing happened: I materialized right in front of a statue of an angel, looked away for less than a second, and suddenly I was alone on a protoplanet on a collision course with a molten Earth. You have to come save me; I don't think I'll survive long enough 'l_

So, the Doctor thinks, if that freak is on Theia, then that means I won. But then he notices another police-box TARDIS and some more footprints (he estimates the whole set to have been there at least an hour) and is utterly confused. Suddenly, the Eleventh Doctor sneaks up behind him and whispers, "I win."

The First Doctor, startled, instinctively turns around and goes into a karate stance. Eleven laughs and introduces himself, "Hello, I'm you," reaching out to shake One's hand. One shakes Eleven's hand cautiously, and then Eleven gets more serious: "Those statues are weeping angels. If they get you, you're dead. As long as you stare at them, they cease to live and become stone."

Then Eleven raises his voice back to a normal level: "Now, let's rescue that 'curly-haired buffoon'—also you."

One is just standing there, trying to process this information; but then Eleven grabs him by the arm and drags him into Eight's TARDIS. "This isn't right," Eleven says. "Ah, well, a TARDIS is a TARDIS."

Theia, circa 4,500,000,000 BC. "That's odd," says the First Doctor. "He should be—" But before the word "here" was even out of his mouth, something appeared directly in front of him and threw him off balance, knocking him over. It was the Eighth Doctor! However, he did not know that his first and eleventh incarnations were already there, and immediately got to work on his note. He wrote really fast, because he knew he might not be able to last another 10 seconds.

Might.

Right as he's starting to cross the _t_ in _to_, Eight finds himself "kidnapped" (or so he thought at first) by, well, himself—who had grabbed him by his arms (left One, right Eleven). They carried him into his TARDIS and dematerialize right as the protoplanet is crashing into the primitive Earth in a fiery explosion. (Somehow, the paper with the Eighth Doctor's incomplete note to himself survives, and orbits the Earth as part of its new ring system until all the rocks coalesce and form the moon—then, by coincidence, the paper stays in lunar orbit until the Eleventh Doctor arrives on the moon in 13500 BC, then falls for an hour and lands right where the First Doctor had found it and picked it up.)

Moon, circa 13000 BC. The Eleventh Doctor comments on how the Earth is "much more beautiful from a safe distance" and chuckles. The First Doctor glares at him. The Eighth is still in the TARDIS, trying to find his place in _The Time Machine_.

Five minutes later, the TARDIS (the earliest instance of it; the one that the First Doctor had stolen before this whole adventure started, and which contained the Eighth Doctor) materialized 20 feet in front of the Eleventh Doctor. A weeping angel appeared out of nowhere, and Eleven instinctively stared at it until his younger self could make it out safely—inadvertently causing the first of many paradoxes and alternate timelines in his eighth life.

Then all three Doctors got into their respective TARDISes and went to their "proper" places in space and time: First - England, 1963; Eighth - who knows where/when; and Eleventh - Amy Pond's backyard, 2010.

THE END (Sorry it's kinda lame.)


End file.
